The Modern LeadHer Way

[087] Leading Your Way: Unapologetically with Sarah Abel

• Emma Clayton • Season 4 • Episode 86

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Sarah Abel, The Funding Godmother, shares her journey from corporate sales manager to successful business owner, revealing how embracing her authentic self transformed both her life and her business approach.
We cover how Sarah:
• Built her training business from £200k to £1.5 million turnover by being true to herself
• Experienced a pivotal turning point during COVID when she confronted her unhappiness
• Met a business mentor who helped her rebuild confidence and embrace her authentic self
• Left corporate after facing a toxic environment when she prioritised family over promotion
• Spontaneously bought a salon with no beauty experience but succeeded through emotional intelligence
• Runs her business on four core values: keeping it real, passion for learning, commitment to success, and above and beyond as standard
• Believes transparent leadership creates psychological safety for team members to admit mistakes
• Uses government funding to help businesses develop their people and scale effectively
• Discovered through human design that she's a "manifesting generator" with natural leadership energy
• Values relationships and authentic connections over material wealth

Follow Sarah on Facebook and visit her website to learn how she can help your business access government funding for growth and development.

Sarah Abel is a business strategist, funded training specialist, author, and speaker with a passion for helping salon owners and beauty professionals scale their businesses through government funding. As the author of The Power of Funding, she shares insights on how to access funding, increase revenue, and create long-term success without financial barriers.

With extensive experience in the hair and beauty industry, Sarah has successfully built multiple businesses, leveraging funding to drive growth and expansion. She understands the challenges business owners face and is committed to helping them unlock funding opportunities, implement proven strategies, and achieve sustainable success. Sarah doesn’t just teach funding—she’s used it herself to grow thriving businesses, and now she’s here to show others how to do the same.


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Emma Clayton:

This is the Modern Leader Way, the podcast for corporate career women who want to feel good on their way to the top. I'm Emma Clayton and I'll be sharing with you tangible advice to help you stop sacrificing your soul in the name of success and experience more balance, confidence and fulfilment both in and out of work. Hello, and welcome back to another episode of the modern leader way podcast with me. Your host, emma, and I have got the wonderful sarah abel, aka the fairy. Uh, what's it?

Sarah Abel:

your funding godmother I nearly got called the fairy godmother. To my audience I went what do you like, fairy godmother or funding godmother? And I think, because of my age, they obviously were the funding godmother almost got it wrong there the funding godmother.

Emma Clayton:

So welcome sarah. I'm super happy to have you on the show oh, thank you.

Sarah Abel:

I'm really honored to be on here, emma. I can't wait to chat. We have lots of good chats, don't oh yeah?

Emma Clayton:

it was fab because we first met. We remembered just after covid, wasn't it? In covid was it in covid?

Sarah Abel:

yeah, it was in covid, I think you were online. I was really struggling with my food and stuff and it was, like I said, you popped up in my feed and it was like, oh, I really like this and I used to watch you all the time.

Emma Clayton:

So it's like yeah, and you happen to be local, which that was really weird, wasn't it?

Sarah Abel:

not everyone will believe in woo woo. I thought it's woo woo. I think it's energy, like I really believe in energy and I believe that you. It's like when you go into a room sometimes and you get a vibe, that energy. I, I can literally read a room from what people are like and because I've you know, I'm in the education business, so I've gone in a lot of rooms where I've walked in and I thought, oh, this room is like there's a lot of egos in this room and a lot of people talking a lot of words that I don't understand yeah, and you're not afraid to say you don't understand why are you complicating that work, that sentence?

Sarah Abel:

why are you putting all these very complicated words when actually you mean this is and I actually have said that to people so what you mean is this, this and this and they go. Yeah well, why didn't you just say that so everyone can understand what is that?

Emma Clayton:

yeah totally and that happens a lot in the corporate world as well. So that's the world we come from originally, right? So we met again a couple of weeks ago and happened like I was honoured to have a little train journey home with you and just pick your brains and you were like, get me on your podcast. I was like, yeah, totally, because when we, when I think about the modern leader, and it just is like you are the epitome of a like doing things your own way. And we'll see that, because we're going to bring in elements of your human design chart, which is fascinating yeah and you haven't.

Emma Clayton:

You haven't heard it before. So this is this will be first for you, and I encourage the listeners to pick up on things that you hear through Sarah's story and then, like we'll see, it translate into your, like how you came here to do things and who you are through your human design, which is fascinating. You now have a very successful business and you've been in business for 25 years or so and you've turned 60.

Sarah Abel:

I went to my mother-in-law the other day and she's 83, 84 and she's quite sprightly still. She has a bit few more illness and I thought, actually, why am I worrying? It's like because when I was 56 and I reached a stage because I'd built a business to about I think it was, the turnover then was about 400k. But it was a bit of a wake-up call because I sort of like came out of Covid and thought, and you know, I wasn't very happy, I really wasn't happy in COVID. I think that gave me some time out really to like think, what do I really want? Where do I want to be? And it was a bit of a wake-up call.

Sarah Abel:

I lost my friend about I must be 11, 12 years ago now. She died of a brain tumor. Beautiful lady, really pretty girl, um, so much fun to be around, and it was very sudden. So basically she literally um was, had some headaches in August it was 2011 literally went to bed that night. I woke up, had a massive stroke and then for six months, you know like had brain injury and, um, I spent quite a lot of time with her in that six months but she never knew who I was anymore, which was really difficult for me because we'd been, she'd been such a big part of my life for such a long time, and her family, in fact. Um, her daughter now works for me only one day a week and she's become a counsellor. So, like, she's amazing. I'm just so proud of her, what she's done. Um, but you know, it was a bit that I think I didn't.

Sarah Abel:

I never really processed that death and I think once we stop, because we're on this treadmill and I think everything came at once, during the COVID time, I really did suffer and my self-confidence was at its ultimate low and I actually met a guy who became my business mentor and completely turned my life around in that time, completely, um, turned my life around in that time. I got in for him to be a mentor for me, to help me my business, but he actually was a coach and he literally completely changed the way I thought and then I started being me. I began, I was me for the first time, as in all my warts and all this is who I am. If you like me, if you like me, if you don't like me, bog off. I'm not going to spare. I would normally have said something different there, but I would. You know that. That that was a real change for me.

Sarah Abel:

But although I haven't been diagnosed with ADHD, I have been diagnosed like people that um diagnose ADHD have said to me Sarah, you are so ADHD at some point, and I think once I had that it was. It was more of a case of, oh, now I understand why I do those things. That's why I do, and I think I've masked myself for so long to fit in um and you know, I come from the corporate world anyway. So I worked for a cosmetic company and basically, um, I didn't conform in the end.

Sarah Abel:

I was really doing like, because I'm really good salesperson, really good business development.

Sarah Abel:

I made them a lot of money for a lot, a lot of years, do you know? I mean like literally did really well in corporate. They were like I think I got um to one of the 40th in the country out of like I think it was 400 area sales managers and they wanted to make me regional and I said no. And as soon as I said no and the reason I said no is because I didn't want to go away from my children when they were young my whole, the whole persona towards me. You know that, what's the word? That kicked in, that toxic environment kicked in, and it was then that I made the decision to leave and, on a whim, I literally walked into a nail salon one day and she said she was selling the business and moving to Spain. I said, oh, I'll buy it off you. I've no hair and beauty experience other than when I was a young girl in a salon. Do you know what I mean? I'd worked as a Saturday girl.

Sarah Abel:

Oh my God. But I hadn't got any hair or beauty background at all, never run a business. When I say I hadn't run a business, that's again a little bit of an untruth, because I'd been. I'd had lots of side hustles do you know what I mean? Like I'd had like children's clothes parties. I think I'd done silver. You know, when I was younger I, so I had quite a lot of experience as how to fail. The difference was, on this occasion I put everything on the line. So it was like you've got to make this work whether you do or not, and it was a real sort of.

Sarah Abel:

I think I did have that skill of emotional intelligence with people. I totally understood where people are coming from and someone said to me recently um, one of your skills is that you have that, um, but my ADHD does sometimes kick in and I'm so literal and I say it and I forget that we're all different and sometimes you need to give feedback in different ways. So now I've surrounded myself in my business with managers that can do that and they're much better at it than me. I said to Julie that one of the directors yesterday I went. I don't want to manage anybody, I just want to leave. That's what I want to do, because when I manage I said I don't enjoy it, it's not my thing. Do you know what I mean? But what I do know is that to be a really good manager you need to have really good emotional intelligence and I think so many people egos get in the way, so it's probably made me in the business. I have now working with people to change that because I think the more that people change the way they think, the better results they get. The business gets better results they get. The business gets better results. They get a bigger pay packet and I think in corporate from a bystander now looking in if they were to put a lot of those skills into the corporate world, the world would be such a better place, and I see it all the time.

Sarah Abel:

I was talking to one of my friends yesterday and she's got a really big business. Her business is about 4.5 million turnover In total. I think she's got about really big business. Her business is about 4.5 million um turnover in total. I think she's got about I think when we were talking she employs about 60 70 people, which you know in the corporate world is probably a smaller business, but she has actually created a corporate business. Now she said and she hates it because I now have this toxic environment that's been created not because she's not she's like that, because she's so far away, but she's brought in managers that are that way inclined. You know what I mean.

Emma Clayton:

What a shame, and I wonder, if you know we were to wind back time, what she would do differently.

Sarah Abel:

I guess there would be some big lessons in there for her in terms of recruitment and who she's bringing on board the thing is in a business, you actually grow from failing, and I think one of the biggest things that I've learned in my business is that your failures are your biggest learns, and the more you fail a you become more resilient. B you learn. As long as you learn from them. Don't keep doing the same mistakes over again, and what I've noticed in people, when they fail over and over again and they don't learn from it, it's not that they haven't learned, it's more that their ego is in the way. You know like it's like.

Sarah Abel:

I cannot fail, because if I'm vulnerable and I'm out there and I admit my mistakes, then I'm making myself very vulnerable to other people that can come in and hurt me. But actually I found it works the opposite. You then attract more people who become more vulnerable. So it mirrors what you say. You know they feel OK to come and say to you, like one of my managers a few months ago, we were doing a thing about building a team, so we were talking about when a team breaks down, you know, like trust and stuff like that. And she said to me afterwards because she's a green, I don't know whether you've read the book uh, surrounded by idiots, I literally leave my business around that any personality books. I literally that's why I was grabbing you said come on, because I thought, oh, I get to get my, I'm gonna find out about me again. Okay, yeah, there's my ego again.

Emma Clayton:

No, I love it too. I love all of that, yeah, yeah it's so interesting.

Sarah Abel:

And, um, she said to me, I just felt as if I wasn't being heard and you know that really hit me. I thought, oh my god, she's because I'm a red, a real red person. So I'm quite direct and I and I think the adhd doesn't help because I'm very literal, so that everything I do, in fact, I use chat gbt before I respond to messages now, because I go, can you put this in a supportive, nice way? Right, love chat gbt. By the way, it's a revenue.

Sarah Abel:

Please put this in a way that I don't sound like an arsehole, because I know that I'm getting. That's why? Because it's not. You know, like even my texts is my husband's like my husband's is saying, like, like we have okay texts. Do you know what I mean? Like okay and then. So then I get from my kids. Have I upset you? Oh, no, no, just in the middle of a meeting and I've looked at your thing, like okay, but it's not because I'm not, uh, but that's what I mean. I think that's where I think in life at the moment we are in a very difficult um way of life because our young people are not learning those type of communications and how you respond to people, which is so sad because I don't think all people, because I've got some really great young people that work for me. But yeah, it's a bit of a iffy one at the moment, isn't it?

Emma Clayton:

Interesting times ahead. Hey, in terms of, like, the future generations and what they're going to bring and in some ways I'm pretty sure they are going to, you know, contribute to shifting the shape of the world as we see it, as we know it, as we see it as we know it and in other ways, I think like we've already done so much to shift things out of a recognizable kind of way anyway, haven't we?

Sarah Abel:

I'm in two minds about this because I was talking to my um, one of my girls the other day it's actually my daughter-in-law I was saying look, you know, with AI and the way things are going, you know your kids are going to need to learn and be skilled. They need to be skilled in whatever they do, because a lot of the jobs that I call unskilled will be replaced. And they are. You've only got to go into Tesco's or to work into Lidl's or any of those stores now and you've got a self-service machine. You know, like, me and my husband went to Thailand the other last year and we were like being served by robot waitresses, do you know? I mean, it's like my god, this is so weird. And the people that actually work on their emotional intelligence are going to go up the chain quicker because they'll be able to get people to do things they normally wouldn't do in a nice way, and then, and what they'll do is they'll be able to get people to do things they normally wouldn't do in a nice way, and then, and what they'll do is they'll retain those people. I mean, you're always going to get your soldiers and there's going to be people who come and go because, especially nowadays because people don't stay in jobs for a long, long time. But if you find your core people within your business and you look after those people and you train them and you develop them to be the best they can be, your business will thrive. And it's a complete proof in my business.

Sarah Abel:

When I look at the leaders that I've got around me, or like the managers I've got around me now, like I'm very open with them, like I will go in and say, look, okay, this person's not doing this, isn't this what we're going to do about it? And they go. Well, actually, sarah, if we go in and tell them what you want to say to them, I don't need to say anything. How are you going to say it and make it work? And and nine times out of ten they come up with those answers. Do you know? I mean, oh, they will, and I love that. The fact that I haven't got to be there and you know, like firefight anymore is like amazing. And that's what I was talking to my friend the other day and she said I just have to go and firefight the big things. And I've got another person in my business who she bought a percentage in my business, so I let go, not a massive amount of equity, but enough to keep her with me. Do you know what I mean? Give her some kind of incentive to stay. And my business when she came in was turning over 200 000 pound. Now it's doing 1.3 to 1.5. It all depends on the government, by the way, because we get government funding. So, depending if they give us the extra 200k which I'm not 100, sure they're going to now but what I'm trying to say, that's a massive jump. Yeah, and you know we don't employ loads of people. We employ about 20 people and some of those are part-time.

Sarah Abel:

So the profitability of that business and what you, you know that the actual, what can I say? That quality of life. Isn't that what we? While we're here, it's not much. Like you know, people get, don't get me wrong. I would love to go on the yacht and I have had the opportunity to do that every now and again, do you know I mean, but I haven't got 250k to spend on a week on the yacht. You know like I've seen a lot of really good influencers that are able to do that or even buy a yacht. I haven't got that spare money in my bank account currently at the moment. But what's the point if you've got no friends? You know, like you, I think relationships are the the be-all and the end-all of life and I think if you've got really good network of people around you, um, that makes all the difference. And an example of that so I can give you and I went to London to a business meeting.

Sarah Abel:

It was a networking meeting. I think it was last week or the week before, I can't remember. Now it's gone so quickly and I had my bag stolen and there was only six um, they were all um, seven figure businesses and there was only one person I knew out of them. She'd invited me. And these people I've never met them in my life at all. They were amazing. They just like stepped up when my bag got stolen.

Sarah Abel:

The lady in the restaurant, you know, she sat with me for an hour going through the tech things I needed to do Because you know, when you lose your everything, I had my iPad, had my iPad in there. So it was like, right, we need to get you off this, we need to get your Apple thing changed, we need to. Well, I can do those things to a degree, but I normally have somebody in the office that sorts it out for me because I'm taking passes. So it was like and and even one of the girls paid for my train ticket because I had no money to cancel all my cards. I had no cash at all because obviously they'd stolen that. So I literally had to get from leicester square to st pancras. Luckily my phone was on the table so I had my train ticket on there.

Sarah Abel:

But even those little small things being in the central of london and I I know I could have walked, it wasn't. It's not that far to walk, but it's like when you're not in a really good, if you're in that anxiety sort of like oh my God, this has happened to me. You're not in a good frame of mind to have all those people surround me and then my family phoning me saying look, no one was hurt, you're absolutely fine. My best friend texted me and said are you all right? You know, when you just think to yourself there, that's what is important in life, money, don't get me wrong, and I I'm a big supporter of money and I'm a woman that goes after money. So I'm sorry if that upsets people. Guess what? Money is not a bad thing if we're in America they're all like behind you. In this country, for some reason, money is like a very bad word. If you have a lot of money, you can do a lot of things, change a lot of things for the good and you can also help a lot of people. And I think it's really sad how some of those things have really changed.

Sarah Abel:

Why is it in corporate? I can only give you my experience. I remember going into a meeting and viewing what I thought okay, which they'd asked for. Do you know what I mean? As in what? Do you know what? What are the problems within the business? And there were problems within the business. There was 12 of us in that meeting and I remember saying what I thought they were and I walked out and this girl said to me this time next year you won't be there, and she was right wow and that's really scary because you know I wasn't derogatory, I was just factual.

Sarah Abel:

You know this is an honest as in the reason I think you're not getting that this amount of of sales is because of this, this and this. And if that was me and this is the feedback I've not just had from me, this is feedback from the team that I'm part of. This is what they are saying. You wanted me to come and give you that information. I'm one of your top sales reps. Why are you not listening to me? You know like it's like. This is what's happening. They didn't like what I said because obviously it was going to cost them some money for a little while, but it would have made them more money long term. Do you know it's such? Was it short-term thinking rather than long-term thinking?

Emma Clayton:

so, yeah, even the you make a good point about money and, like in the corporate world, we're encouraged not to talk about how much we earn, and you know exactly why. That is because I can't talk to you about the salary that I'm on, because then I can't go and complain that I'm not getting paid as much as you and it perpetuates this, this gender pay gap that we've got right.

Sarah Abel:

Yeah, it needs to be transparent because I think the more transparent that you are I mean, we have a really transparent in in my business. It's everybody if you do this, you get this. So, like in our admin team, this is what you can earn, and if you get this, you get this, so that it's all. This is where you can go with that, I mean. But you know, it isn't always about money like I've got, I mean, we I would say a lot of my team have paid well. However, they deliver well as well. So, like you cannot like. So if we went into a meeting with somebody and they wanted to be at that, you need to do this if you. So it's very structured where they can move up within the business.

Sarah Abel:

Some people are quite happy with where they're at. They don't want that added responsibility. They don't want that added um stress. They see it as such, and it can be stressful when you're running a team because you know you're dealing with lots of people's problems, lots of people's challenges, lots of people in that, and sometimes that's difficult um, so they should be paid more. If you're going to be managing a team, then you should get more money, and you know that.

Sarah Abel:

That's one of the things that I think to myself all the time when I look at the people we've employed and they've all come from the bottom, they've all worked up. Every time I have employed somebody from the outside who's come from some kind of corporate background, like I have some people from the FE colleges and they are a nightmare, you know, like their whole, like my culture in my business is about like we have four values and those values are keeping it real, passion for learning, committed to succeed and, above and beyond, as standard. Now I hear that all the time in corporate world and I go in there and think where are these people living? These values, ours are judged on it at every one-to-one, every team meeting we discuss and you, it's a really good way to run your business because you can look very, very much. This is our vision. This is what we're trying to um actually accomplish these values we've got.

Sarah Abel:

If somebody's not aligned with those values, they get off the bus. That's how I've always looked at it, as in they're not really our person. So why have we got them in the business? Because toxic person in your business is like and I think that's probably the problem with corporate they get so big that nobody is able to manage those things unless you have a really good manager, and there's some, there is some amazing managers I've met, you know. A lot of those people have left corporate and become coaches or they started their own business themselves because they want to, yeah, because they want to make a difference. And you know, I was listening to a lady yesterday and she was Tuesday and she was talking. She does a thing called shadow work and she'd be a real top, like you know, like on on the board as such, and she it made her real, you know, like it was like how scary is that? That made you poorly, that you were working for the business that you were in.

Emma Clayton:

That's not good yeah, no, and I love what you you talk about values, because I feel like they're the kind of behavioral measures, aren't they? And oftentimes what I see, or what my experience in the corporate world is, you have these values from the top down and like they might not meet my personal values, but okay, I can kind of get behind them. But where's the measure? Because your behavioral kind of performance is still based on what you do day to day and how you interact with the team, not necessarily on these values, and I think that is because of um, like that's a symptom of size, I do think, though, when you say about your personal, I do think that has to be part of it.

Sarah Abel:

I think that is because of like, that's a symptom of size. I do think, though, when you say about your personal, I do think that has to be part of it. I think if you're working for a business, if your personal values do not align with their business values, then you might not be there, and I'll give you an example of that. So Julie and I who is the other director in the business? I mean, we're yin and yang. So if you look on disc, I at the, I'm the influencer and the um dominant and she's at the bottom is, it's um, subconscious, think of them in colors because I'm ADHD, but basically we are. And if you look on the chart, I'm there and she's there, so I'm right in the middle and she's right in the middle at the bottom, and we so complement each other, and that came completely by accident. So, like literally, um, she was working for me and this is what I'm saying about making mistakes in your business and I had another manager over her at the time.

Sarah Abel:

She came to work for me as an assessor teacher she was. She had worked in corporate, she'd been on a board in London. She left because, um, she had a child and the at that time they didn't have the fast trains going up to London from Folkestone. It was very much like the old on the train for a couple of hours going up. I know, completely awful. And she said so she left and what she said to me was she came to work for me as she had a business and she came to work for me as a assessor, so we both had salons, and she was the same for me as a as a assessor, so we both had salons, and she was the same as me bookkeeper, bought a salon. Yeah, do you know what I mean? She came to work for me because she realized that, although in the hair and beauty industry you can make money, salons are a, it's not an easy thing to do, do you know?

Emma Clayton:

what.

Sarah Abel:

I mean, like I'm my, anyone that's got a chain of salons. I look up to you because that, because you've got a lot of people to manage, you've got a lot of people's personalities and a lot of people in there are creatives, and because they are so creative, they're very, you know, like me, not me. So it's like so for her it was, and she's very much the opposite. She's a blue-green, so like not, yeah, no, through and through blue julius, so like very, um, um, pragmatic, very much like detailed and stuff like that. And though she hate, could not stand the woman that was in my business that was looking out for her and she was going to leave.

Sarah Abel:

And it was only because one of the other girls came to me and said sarah, I just thought I'd let you know that you're possibly going to lose Julie. And it was like, oh my god, let's get. And I had never looked at her CV at that point. So I read her CV and went, oh my god, and at the time I was looking for a quality manager and I thought you tick all the boxes. So I, I rang her and went, come round for coffee. And she came round for coffee and we ended up.

Sarah Abel:

Um, I, she said no to me about four times and I went please, like beggy beggy do you know what I mean? But oh, you did two days a week and now she's like it's full time for my business. She's got a bit of equity in my business as well. She's thought something that she's my best friend. How weird is that, you know? But when we sat down and wrote our values together, they really aligned, our personal values aligned, and that said volumes to me. So then we went and took it to the team that we had and guess what majority of those ones aligned some, I think, lied. They're no longer here anymore. Yeah, and, and like you just said it's, I think if you don't align with the values, it's very difficult to stick. Yeah, completely. There's so many tangents I could go off, but I feel like we need to sort of find If you don't align with the government's values, it's very difficult to stick with the company.

Emma Clayton:

Yeah, completely. There's so many tangents. I could go off, but I feel like we need to sort of wind it back a little bit and so you can tell us what your business is in terms of the funding. Godmother, tell us what that means, because you've mentioned you've got your salons and there's, basically, help businesses to grow using government money.

Sarah Abel:

That's exactly what I do. So, um, corporates, um, there's loads like they have the apprenticeship levy, so we deliver apprenticeships, we deliver adult skills. Um, budgets, we have advanced loans basically your taxes that you pay. I'll get them back to help your businesses grow. You know, I've helped people get um government grants. We've got government grants, um, I've helped people get government loans.

Sarah Abel:

Anything to do with money to scale the business we can do. It doesn't matter. And I what I think the problem is in the, in the apprentice, in the education business, is that there's too many training providers out there that are not commercially viable, as in, they're not commercial, they go in and if you can use funding in your business to create leaders, to create people that you know align with who you are as a business, and teach them those skills. Because I think what very often happens in a lot of businesses not just corporate, but in a lot of businesses, not just corporate, but in a lot of businesses if somebody's failing over here, they take that person because they want to remove the problem from over there and they put them in a problem over here and more often than not, they make the managers.

Emma Clayton:

Oh my God, yeah, I've seen it so many times.

Sarah Abel:

And it's like why would you do that? That person's failing over here and now you're going to take them over there and tox up. That's going to be toxic all down here. So and I don't always necessarily think it's that person's fault I think the reason that person's like that they haven't even got the skills or they're to be able to change. Do you know? I mean, they don't know how to. So you, as an employer, it's your responsibility to change that. And that's why I love the love, all the funded training, because there's so much money out there and if you can work with a training provider like me, okay, then you'll know that it's going to be because all our courses are aligned with that. And if they're not, because we're very much um, because we are um governed by the government. So, basically, like, all our money um comes from the education skills funding agency.

Sarah Abel:

So we have to um, jump through the Ofsted, um stuff and you know like people always go Ofsted. Oh my god, do you know what Ofsted were the most helpful people for us? We had our Ofsted. Oh my God, do you know what Ofsted were one of the most helpful people for us? We had our Ofsted last year and I had amazing people that came to us and they were absolutely brilliant and the way that they spoke to us that group of people were like and we were absolutely terrified because it was our very first Ofsted, because we'd only had a direct contract since 2020. We've always subcontracted, so when you subcontract, your lead provider is the one that they're tested, not you. But we've had experience of Ofsted so we sort of knew um, but we prepared for it. You know, we got somebody in that knows what they're looking for. We made sure we filled those holes to make sure that they weren't there anymore, because they were there. You know they were, it was and again, it wasn't a case of that. We were rubbish, it was, but we didn't know. You don't know what you don't know, and that's the whole point. And I think if you can get over to people in your teams and your managers and your people like that you don't know what you don't know, okay. So if you muck up and you will do as a manager, you will say the wrong thing, you will do the wrong thing your team are much more likely to get behind you if you go.

Sarah Abel:

Listen, emma, I'm so sorry. The way that I spoke to you earlier on was bang out of order, but I just had a phone call from my daughter to tell me that x amount of things has happened and you walked in a moment and it wasn't everything to do with you, it was totally to do with me and I apologize for that. You know that that in itself is like that's not being vulnerable, that's just being transparent and honest and that's right. That's my whole point. Let's just be go back to being like human beings that, um, have all our flaws, because every single one of us have. You know, like you know, I had a conversation with you this morning where I said you know, I've said something to somebody and it was not true and it was my ego jumping in, and it was like, oh my god, that ego is back.

Sarah Abel:

And I was on the phone to her and said, look, this is I said this yesterday and this is the reason I said it. And I feel like, oh my god, that ego is back. And I was on the phone to her and said, look, this is I said this yesterday and this is the reason I said it. And I feel like a dick and I've kept me awake all night and I have lovely message back from her. You know, like I think you are not, I put you on the spot. I totally get it and you're probably the least amount.

Sarah Abel:

But I didn't do it that. I did that because I needed to get it. One of my, one of of my values is keeping it real and I really live that value and every time I've gone against it and I have, you know, like I maybe I've let somebody in that I know is not going to be the right client for us because of some of the things they say in the sales call, but then I've got to get that extra sale, so it's like I'll take them in. They become problems and I always regret it. So, like now, I've got to the point, I think, over the years, where I say I go, no go, I'd rather lose you and lose that money than bring you into my business, because I can replace you with two people that do align with my values and they'll be a lot better than that, you know yeah, yeah, completely.

Emma Clayton:

And just going back to the thing you were saying about taking this problem from here and putting them there, what I saw a lot in so I was in reinsurance, so it was a very technical environment. We had a lot of actresses, a lot of underwriters. These people had been 10, 20, 30 years in their role. They were technical experts right at what they did, but they would reach a ceiling because they are a senior technical expert, and so the next natural thing to do is put them in a leadership role. Yeah, yeah, and they're not leaders and they're not leaders. And I think emotional intelligence is one thing that I am not so sure is easy to train yeah, I don't know.

Sarah Abel:

It's about training. I think it's about getting reading the right books. It's about, and I think I think emotional intelligence comes from awareness and I think it's becoming aware of who you are as a person and then, once you become really aware of who you are a person, know those triggers and those traits that make you like that and then work on them. When I spoke to that girl on tuesday, or that lady on tuesday, she triggered me. There was something that she said to me that triggered me, so I reacted. Do you know what I mean? So like, that's absolutely fine, but to be able to come away and reflect on that and go, why did I do that? This is the reason I obviously still free, threatened by that. Okay, because that's the only way, the time when you are triggered, it's because you, you feel threatened by it.

Sarah Abel:

It's like quite right and and and like. From an impulsive nature that I am. It was like that's how I went back, where some people would go back and like they wouldn't maybe like say anything, but you would see by their face. Do you know what I mean? So like, I think it's very much, like, I think it can be taught. I think you've got to want to be taught it, and there's a difference, and I think if you are really open to becoming a better, work on yourself, if you work on yourself and you become a better person, your emotional intelligence will improve, because ultimately, you will understand other people, and it's paid. I mean an example I used to have a client that used to come in, and every time she used to come in, she never used to smile, and all the girls in the salon at that time used to say to me that woman is so bloody miserable, and I used to think it, and I, and I used to think it too, and I used to think why, though?

Sarah Abel:

I wonder why she's so miserable? She's so she never smiles. When I talk to her, when I think I've said something funny, she doesn't laugh. Do you know what I mean? Our perspective is it's something we're doing, it, it's something that's about us. But as I grew that relationship with her, as she came in more often and I got chatting to her, the reason she never smiled was because her gums were receding and she's super paranoid about showing her teeth absolutely, and hence she has nothing to do with

Sarah Abel:

you, and that's what I mean and that's where I think the ego comes in. Like, people always judge other people on what you know my kids, when they go to their proms and stuff like that they were like oh, do I look all right, mom, do I do this, this and this? And I went. No one's gonna be worrying about you. They're gonna be looking at everyone, thinking about how, like, if you always think of people as being like, no one gives a shit about you, the only thing they worry about is themselves. So, like, if you make those people feel as if they're important in any and that's listening to people and actually responding to what they've got to say you'll build relationships. Because people are not heard, like that girl said to me, that my manager said to me Sarah, I felt not heard. That's the whole point. If you stop hearing people, then people will turn against you and and not turn again they won't want to be around you because none of us get heard anymore.

Emma Clayton:

That's the problem? Yeah, absolutely. I love that and I feel like just one eye on time. I want to get into your human design because this is just going to be like awesome.

Emma Clayton:

So let me see if I can uh share my screen like this is I talk about human design as the next best thing since mbti? So if you know, the my bricks, yeah, so this is a good time, if you're listening, to switch over to the youtube so that you can see and follow along on the screen. You tell me if you can see?

Sarah Abel:

yeah, I can see something it's about.

Emma Clayton:

Oh my god, that looks complicated oh, it looks complicated and don't worry too much about it. So this is what's called your body graph, right?

Sarah Abel:

so this is based on birth data and I've done a whole series on human design um in the past with sue, who is my who you met actually at the be your own we're going to an event and she's going to be there, so be oh yeah, yes, yes, that's it big fest look at the shout out for my friend because it's her hers and it's amazing. Anyone that wants to go there, who wants to start a business. It's a fantastic place to go. Yeah, I can't wait, it's gonna be amazing, right?

Emma Clayton:

so this is your body graph and so we. It's like your how to operating manual. When you can like decipher some of this and you don't have to, because I'm going to tell you a few things that stand out to me, it's kind of like it makes a lot of sense in terms. You know what you're saying very early on about. It's all about energy and, like, when you walk in a room, you can read the energy. Well, this is, this is your energy, this is your energy that walks in the room.

Emma Clayton:

But actually, when you're in alignment with how you were sort of born to operate in this world, that's when you can maximize your energy with less effort, because it's so natural to you. It's your natural nature, right? So the first thing we start with is your energy type. So this is you're a pure manifesting generator. So 70 of the population are generator types, and so, if you see this pink box here, this is your sacral center, this is your creative center, your life force energy.

Emma Clayton:

So you have access to that because it's defined, it's colored in, and this just means you have life force energy within you to go, go, go and not stop if you love what you do right. And that's true, yeah, that's the key. So, basically, if you love what you do, you generate energy around it and, by the same token, if you don't love what you do, it's going to degenerate that energy. So you're going to know straight away and, um, some kind of key words for a manifesting generator is um, if you feel frustrated about something, then it's a big signpost that either you're out of alignment yeah, approaching something or like the thing is out of alignment for you oh my god, that's so true, right, and by like. The opposite end of the spectrum is satisfaction. So if you can sit down at the end of the day and feel really satisfied, no matter how busy you were, no matter how much you were juggling, if you feel that's, I had a good day then you were totally in alignment.

Emma Clayton:

So that's a really good sign. Manifest and generate it, and this is why you know the whole adhd thing. I think also makes sense. But from an energy perspective, you have like a faster energy and so of the 70 percent of generators, manifesting generators is a subtype and there's less of you, but you have like this quickening of energy, like this real tendency to want to do things faster. You get an abundance of ideas. Oh, yeah, and at times you can move way too fast for other people around you oh, and you know what?

Sarah Abel:

it's really funny. I was talking to my PA this morning and she went to me and she's amazing, by the way, big shout out for Martina. She's listened to this, cause she will. She said to me, Sarah, she said sometimes with some things I don't feel as I have enough time to make it really good. Do you know what I mean? And I and there was a reason why she had to do that task, but I am aware of that.

Emma Clayton:

Do you?

Sarah Abel:

know what I mean. Yeah, I get it, martina, and I know, and you know, and at the end of the day, it's just, it's like, oh, we've got to do this, we've got to do this, and that's why I'm a good leader with I'm not a good manager. Do you know what I mean? Like difficult, like if I put an hour in my diary, it's actually an hour and a half, and I and even at this point in time, it's like like I know, at 10 o'clock I've got another meeting. It's like, oh, my god, it's like you know what I mean.

Emma Clayton:

It's like that's all right, yeah yeah, yeah, okay, so that it really does fit. And even when I first met you, I thought, yeah, this made sense. If you weren't a manifesting generator when this popped up, I think I'd done something wrong. Um, and just to make mention, actually you you weren't sure what time you were born. If I just show you this real quick, it's not. You might not be able to see it because it'll be birth time range, right. So whether you were born at um midnight, three o'clock in the morning, nine o'clock in the morning, you are, you can see here a three, five pure manifesting generator all the way through until until six o'clock and then it slightly changes in your profile um with the numbers, but I'm not too worried about that.

Emma Clayton:

So we're we're working on this basis quite confidently. That that's what you are. So one thing about your energy is you have this big, like manifesting generators. Generators they have this big, welcoming, enveloping energy. It's like a warm, big hug. So you walk into a room and you do have that energy and that's by contrast to other energy types. Right, they won't necessarily have that same big energy.

Emma Clayton:

So and again, but I think you know that about yourself and you're here really to respond to life. That's what you're here to do. So you see opportunities and you're responding. And the way you respond you're like inbuilt, like decision making compass, if you like, is the sacral center, like decision making compass, if you like, is the sacral center okay. So what that means is you are likely to experience and you can tell me this if this resonates if you're faced with making decisions day in, day out, right as a leader, as a business owner, you are likely to sense a clear yes or no. That comes from within and it almost comes out as a sound yeah. So it's almost like uh-huh or uh-uh, like your sound will absolutely totally.

Sarah Abel:

And it's really weird. You said that for a few like last year I think was last year, the year before my mentor, who I still speak to now he doesn't coach me anymore, but I went. He went to me, he sent me a like a podcast which was about making decisions quickly because he said you know, he said you know every single time. But because that that this is the validation part of me where it comes from a child, it's like are they right and I'm wrong? But I actually do know. I say to my husband all the time I do know, I know this. Why have I done that? I know I knew right from the beginning that that was, that was what I needed to do and I didn't. And I think that's where I get my frustration sometimes with myself. It's like why did you not do that in the first place? If you don't trust in that, oh thanks that's awesome.

Emma Clayton:

So that's, that's the sacral and actually a few of the things you've said. So we've got this beautiful color going down these, you know, the chakras. Are you based on that? So what, what? What we're seeing with the colour is you've got definition there.

Emma Clayton:

So you've got consistent access to the energy in that centre. For example, your head centre is where you receive ideas, yeah. Your asana is where you kind of process them, yeah, yeah. And you've got your throat is where you speak them out into existence. Yeah, you've got your G centre, which is like a real sense of self, actually this self-awareness and a real sense of direction. Yeah, I think that's a big thing. And then you've got your sacral center, which we talked about, that life force energy, that decision making center, and so that this is like your power, like these are your. You access this throughout the day, naturally, and when other people are in your energy, if they don't have a defined head, for example, they're likely to borrow your definition. It's really fascinating just from an energetic perspective. Um, so this is really good because you can receive ideas, you can process them, you can speak them out loud, you can get direction to your team and then you can make decisions right. Really certainly okay, I love it.

Sarah Abel:

It's great, isn't it? So me, this is so like more. You talk about it, I think, oh my god.

Emma Clayton:

I know right, I could go on and on. There's so much in this, but I'm just sort of scratching the surface for you. I will.

Sarah Abel:

We'll talk about this another time, because yeah definitely yeah for sure, um.

Emma Clayton:

So here actually this is. This is the heart center, is also known as the ego center. Yeah, it's a lot about ego and yours is white, so it's undefined, and I think is about um, 80% of the population have an undefined ego and it's really fascinating to see people like I know people I'm close with people that do have a defined ego centre and they are very sure of themselves. It's kind of enviable. So when we're talking about a lot of the childhood stuff that comes up that makes us feel like question ourselves, this is because we have an undefined ego centre and this is just where self-worth lives. So when we have it undefined, it's just where conditioning gets in throughout our life, right, so it kind of makes sense.

Emma Clayton:

And then you have your emotional center over here. So, by contrast, I'm an emotional authority, so I don't get that hit of yes or no. I get emotional waves, but I don't make a decision in the emotional wave. I wait until it's ridden out. So I have to sleep on it for at least one sleep, yeah, yeah, just to give you a distinction. And then you have this completely open root center and spleen. So spleen is where, like, fears and instincts and intuition live, and it's not bad that it's open. It just means you have the potential for a lot of conditioning in there. But you also might take on other people's fears and that kind of thing.

Sarah Abel:

So it's just really I'll give you an example of that. So when I was, I went to, I spoke at somebody's mastermind the other day and so I got to spend the whole day there for free which was lovely and talking to people. And, um, there was somebody there talking about social media, about getting your like, influencing and getting your thing across, and I said do you know what? Like one of the biggest things I've struggled with with social media is? I've been told so many different things and when I went on social media back in 2020, and the only reason I did was to keep in touch with my salons and my my literal it literally grew from 40 to like 700 in like eight weeks.

Sarah Abel:

I was just being myself and then it sort of like then people started saying, well, if you're selling this, you can't be this, you can't be that. So I took on all that you know all their opinions. And like she be this, you can't be that. So I took on all that, you know all their opinions. And, like she said to me sarah, you need to stop listening to these people, because you know, and like, what you've just told me earlier on is, I know I don't need to have those, but that speaks why I do okay it's good to know that and to go.

Emma Clayton:

Is this fear mine? Is this emotion mine, because you've got an emotional center. If it's not, it's okay, just like leave it, leave it over there to them. And it's like I said, there's like so much in here with the lines, I think this um, you've got quite a few gates and channels of leadership in there, right alpha, yeah, yeah, that energy coming through in your chart which I'm like uh-huh, uh-huh, and then here's the, here's the kind of um thing that sways. It is your um, let me just get rid of so your incarnation cross. This is like 70 of your essence. Yours is the vessel of love. I like that, it just sounds nice. But here, which I think will make a lot of sense, the energy of your cross is based in love love of spirit, love of body, love of humanity and love of the self.

Emma Clayton:

You are the embodiment of love and your love is driven to find self-love right. Yeah, cross is looking for a way to express itself as an individual example of love for all to see. Yeah, just feel like it's like a really rounded beautiful, like you've got this masculine kind of leader, alpha energy, like this ability to communicate, really like all these ideas. And actually, if we go back to your chart very quickly, this um g centre has got a lot of numbers that are highlighted. That's a lot of gifts that you've got in there to pull on, and this is where you give so much direction, that vision, that strategy to your team and it's just, yeah, it's really lovely to see you've got that real balance. But actually, ultimately, at the end of the day and I think you said something like at the end of the day, and I think you said something like at the end of the day, we're all human and it's like all just about being ourselves. I think that is the essence of you.

Sarah Abel:

And I think it's really weird, isn't it? How, like as a child and like because the world does mask that sometimes for you so like you stop being who you are and that's that's where I was in 2020. I stopped being me. I'd got to a point and that's you know, like you said earlier on about you know, that feeling that that's, this is not right, this is not who I'm meant to be here, and it was really weird.

Sarah Abel:

That's when I went back to sort of like I started reading a lot about future self, where do I want to be, and then I started doing a lot of personal development again on me, which I always did when I was younger, and I'd stopped because it was like and I think that was just outside influences, things that happened to me, and it's like you know, being in business is not always the easiest the thing and you, you are knocked down over and over again. I mean, you know, like I do believe if you can stay in corporate and make shit loads of money and invest it, you're better off. Don't leave and start your own business is the hardest thing in the world and it really is the hardest thing in the world, but then probably would I be the person I have to say if I hadn't because it pushed me out of my comfort zones to be. Yeah, this is amazing. You should do more of this. It's amazing.

Emma Clayton:

Well, we'll chat offline for sure um there is more. But, sarah, thank you so much. It's been wonderful having you on and chatting. Thank you, I'll make sure that links to follow you on Facebook and all the things website and stuff are included in the show notes. But thank you so much.

Sarah Abel:

You're welcome. Thank you for having me, emma. I've loved it, thank you.

Emma Clayton:

And everyone else. Thanks for listening and take care. I'll see you next time, you.

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